things I expected from watching glass onion with my family: a fun evening with a movie I know weâll all enjoy
things I did not expect from watching glass onion with my family: my mother going on a 15 minute rant about how much she hates Hugh grant (based on his 15 seconds of screen time) and how Benoit Blanc deserves better, and then my dad defending Hugh Grant because he was holding a sourdough starter and thatâs the âsign of a caring partnerâ
When I came out, I was SO scared I was gonna get disowned. I wrote a letter to my parents, sent it to their emails, put a physical copy on the counter, and left the house for a few hours to give them time. In that time I tried coffee for the first time, which was a dreadful idea, and got all jittery. I kept waiting for a text or something but nothing happened.
After a few hours, I didnât hear back from them so I went home. My parents were home and had stacked a bunch of groceries on top of the letter without opening it. They said âhiâ and I said âhiâ and went down stairs to the basement. I held my dog and panicked about what to do. My sister, who knew that I had written them a letter of great importance, told me they hadnât read it yet. She also told me she could ask them to do so. I consented to this and stayed in the basement. A few minutes later my dad knocked on the door and poked his soft smooth little nerd head in and said âhey buddyâ and I started crying so hard I almost vomited. He came over and gave me a BIG hug and said that it was gonna be OK, he was OK with this, he knew it must have been hard but he was here for me. He told me he and my mom had already talked years before they had me about how if they had to pick between their faith and their child theyâd pick their child. It was a very sweet moment. I came out to my mom later that evening and we were both bawling the whole time.
The day after I came out to my parents, I came out to my brother @inbabylontheywept at a Mexican restaurant and he took it like a champ. That evening my mom took me for a walk and looked almost angry – she said she wanted to make sure that I didnât use being a woman as an excuse to not go to grad school. I told her I wouldnât and she instantly looked relieved and happier.
My dad, on the other hand, seemed to struggle with it. He kept asking me if I had a boyfriend, and I told him I did not. He kept asking me if I wanted to go clothes shopping with him and I did not. He kept asking me if I would let him go to some of my shows, and I had NO idea what he was talking about.
Finally, 6 months after coming out, of awkward misgendering and questions that didnât make sense from my dad, he excitedly pokes his soft smooth little nerd head into my bedroom again and says âI found a movie about Your People.â My people. I was absolutely bewildered, but he was so excited and I knew he had been trying SO hard so I watched it with him. It was The Birdcage, and it was amazing. It also was revelatory in that I finally realized why my initially-supportive father seemed to be having such a hard time with my pronouns and stuff – he didnât know what the difference between trans and doing drag was. After the movie he again asked if I would invite him to one of my shows, and I said, âHey dad, you know how about half the world is women?â And he said âyeah,â and I said âWell, see, Iâm on that half now. Iâm not doing drag.â And it was like a switch flipped in his brain. He was like âomg thatâs so easy? I was so confused about what to call you when?â
Anyway, my parents are charming and my family has been so kind and patient with me, I like sharing the stories of my little wins with them.
i look you in the eye with a coldness and cruelty and joy and love that cannot be contained with soft language
Do the weird thing that makes your soul glow or it will fucking kill you. Possibly literally. Even if you physically survive, you will not feel alive until you start doing the weird thing that makes your soul glow.
Make up.
Not make up.
Clothing. Nudity.
Art. Cooking. Dancing weird. Choosing the book that others would not. Writing letters. Writing fiction. Lore. More.
I awoke from a nightmare and I felt the moon touch my face with two glowing hands as she lay in the air suspended above me. “What was the first lesson I taught you?”
“Oh”
“Yes. You’ll be fine. But you have to.”
I would have apologized by she kissed me into silence and then disappeared with the sound of twilight turning over.
Do the thing. That makes your soul glow. Or it will. Fucking. Kill you.
I was awoken to tell you this, remind you of this.
There is. No time limit. But. If you can start now. It’ll be best.
If not now, soon.
Good morning.
No.
I am a creature haunted and cursed.
This is what I do, this is why I am here.
Not for you, specifically. But also not just for myself, exclusively.
Black Friday is such a joke nowadays. âDonât miss out on 30% offâ donât piss me the fuck off. People used to hit each other over the head for a microwave thatâs how low the prices were. People literally died. We used to be a country
The article is nauseating. And considering all the other shady shit Bain Capital’s been involved with, I can’t say I’m surprised to see them show up for several years’ worth of this mess.