Numbers that can’t be divisible by 5 are funnier than numbers that can be divided by 5 because they’re needlessly specific. Except in some cases for very small or very large numbers.
The answer to life, the universe, and everything being 42? Funny because it’s needlessly specific.
Patrick from SpongeBob looking at a store stacked with hundreds of mattresses and saying there’s ten of them? Funny because it’s a small number.
If a character wishes to estimate how many soldiers are approaching a nearby town and you want to make it funny you can do one or the other or you can combine the two.
My lord, there are five soldiers coming, we must strengthen our defenses!
Or
How many soldiers are there? Nine thousand, three hundred and forty seven, sir. I counted twice. They lost one the second time to falling off a cliff.
Or
There’s sixteen soldiers approaching, sir. Only sixteen? Yes. It’s a good number, sixteen. Divisible by four.
A guy in the back is yelling this after the scout gives his report.
A guy in the back
is yelling this after the
scout gives his report.
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
In a continuation of Things I Shouldn’t Have To Say, But Here We Find Ourselves:
Israel did not cause the wildfires currently ravaging Southern California.
No, really, whatever your opinions are about how Israel is conducting itself, whatever your political beliefs are about the ongoing crisis in the Levant, Israel did not cause wildfires in California.
Take off your tin-foil hat, MTG, Israelis do not control the weather. Jews outside of Israel also do not control the weather, just so we’re clear.
Before you start talking about the devastating ecological impacts of Israel’s actions in Gaza (and military action is, of course, destructive to the environment), California has experienced worsening fire seasons for the past 30+ years. This year, although horrific in its tragedy, is not unforeseen. This has been happening in California with more and more frequency. And that is awful! We need to address climate change! But that is a negative trajectory that predates what is happening in Gaza.
“Israel caused the wildfires in California,” is not a big-brain take, it’s a conspiracist’s take that isn’t anymore true when it comes from the left than it is when MTG says it on the right.
Aid to Israel has almost no impact on funding available to help the people impacted by the fires or disaster response.
This is not a question of whether or not you should or shouldn’t support the United States giving military aid to Israel. That is a different issue. However, the military aid being given by the U.S. to Israel has essentially zero impact on the disaster response in California.
Foreign aid makes up 1% or less of the federal budget. Foreign military aid is less than half of that amount. And of foreign military aid, only a portion goes to Israel. That’s a fraction of less than half of one percent, for those keeping score. In the scheme of “where did my taxpayer dollars go,” aid to Israel is not even a bit player even if you disapprove of providing that aid.
Moreover, American Jews very much do not control Congress, and Israel even less so, which is who passes the federal budget each year. That’s some Protocols nonsense.
FEMA is underfunded though, so call your representatives in Congress to demand they pass supplemental appropriations for FEMA and AmeriCorps (which is where FEMA Corps is housed, administratively) so that people hit by the ongoing natural disasters can get the help they need.
Beyond that, California’s disaster response is also based on funding allocations made by the state of California. Again, this is not controlled by either Israelis or American Jews, and if you think it is please put down the Protocols and go outside for a nice walk and silent contemplation. But if you’re Californian, by all means please call your legislators to ask what more can be done for the folks in Southern California.
This isn’t karma or divine justice.
Yeah, that one is just the GOP blaming the gays for hurricanes but wearing a leftist hat. It’s no more true now than it was then.
Good grief, folks, c’mon!
This has been a long, terrifying, exhausting week and the LA area is still under Fire Weather Watch. The last thing we need is chucklefucks spreading conspiracy theories blaming people who are directly impacted for what is happening (multiple families in my synogogue community have lost their homes and the Pasadena Jewish Temple and Center was completely destroyed). So instead of spreading misinformation, donate to relief efforts. Here, I’ll help with some links
Watch Duty (non profit that tracks fires in real time and updates with containment status, evacuation centers, evacuation zones, and other incredibly useful information. I was glued to this app for the past week and it helped two of my friends get out in time; quite literally, it helped save their lives)
Please, if you can, donate. And for fuck’s sake, stop with the conspiracy theories.
amhrancas 