I pause solemnly and look up from the religious text. “And what do we say upon seeing the footwear of Lil Wayne?” I ask.
“Those are his Hooves, you Bitch,” the people respond.
“And when do we wear them?”
“Upon escaping from the law,” comes the reply.
“And who has taught us this?”
“Sherlock Holmes,” the response choruses.
“And what are they for originally?” I say in the weary tone of someone who has had to do this a lot.”
The mixed murmur is a little shameful. I sigh. “And what are they for originally?”
“Pony kink,” the response emerges reluctantly.
“And what do we say?”
“Your kink is not my kink and that’s okay.”
“Let us regret.”
We all regret.
Because I am that person, and cannot hold myself back, I add perkily: “interestingly, this design is kind of the reverse of jockey racing boots, where the metal horseshoe is on the heel!”
Nobody is interested in this. I should have given up long ago on trying to “hear me out” or infodump on the topic of jockeys. But, you know what, I’m the one up here with the shawl, leading the sacred texts. Sometimes my interests will emerge. Oh well.
NEW YORK — President Donald Trump is pulling the U.S. out of the World Health Organization for a second time, the White House announced late Monday.Â
The day-one executive order fulfills Trump’s campaign promise to reject global institutions. Health experts worry it isolates the U.S. with consequences for pandemic and disease response and diplomatic relations worldwide.
The U.S. is and has historically been the largest funder of the global health agency headquartered in Geneva, Switzerland. WHO, part of the United Nations, is tasked with preparing for and fighting health emergencies. The U.S. has strongly influenced the agency since its founding after World War II.
Ive said this before but swear the biggest skill to learn as an adult is how to resist high-pressure sales tactics. You do NOT have to answer questions with anything other than “Sorry I’m not interested.” No matter how nice they are or no matter how many follow up questions they ask or even how agitated they get when you stand your ground. Just keep saying I’m not interested. Don’t answer their questions. Don’t give them an opening to try to push back on your reasons. Be a fucking brick wall of I’m not interested.
When we bought our car, I told Sean to let me handle it. I walked in and said “We have X for a down payment and cannot pay more than Y in monthly payments.” My Y number had some leeway, but I didn’t mention that.
First thing the sales guy did after I laid down the rules was turn to Sean and go, “What’s your number?” And Sean said. “Oh, no, you negotiate with Gayle.”
So, strike one for the sales guy. Could not divide and conquer us by implying THE MAN would not surprised at what I laid down.
Sales guy then had to confer with his manager and left us at his desk for several minutes. I have a vague recollection (this was 16 years ago) of Sean and I amusing ourselves doing bits about the other people there to look at cars. I am sure we did not give off the stressed or nervous energy they were hoping for.
Guy comes back. His first offer is fifty dollars a month more than I told him we could pay. I looked at him and said “I gave you our upper limit.”
“Well, but what’s another 50 bucks a month?”
“Something I can’t afford.”
He didn’t know what to do with my open and unashamed admittal that I had a budget because my money was finite.
He went back to talk to the manager again.
It took two more rounds of “I told you what I can afford” before he finally came back 20 bucks under what I’d stated as my max.
The trick to resisting high-stress sales tactics is doing the math at home, knowing exactly what you can afford, and then walking into the room and stating that number minus 15%. Then refusing to budge from that number. Never, ever, meet then where they want. Always meet them where you want. Because at the end of the day, you can walk away and go somewhere else and say “I told the people at Z what my terms were, and they refused to work with me. Here are my terms. Meet them, and you make a sale today.”
Something about this is so genuine and funky. It feels so natural that if I heard the correct lyrics it wouldn’t process as right in my brain. This man yelling about his green tea and watermelon sour patch kids fits so well with the live music playing in the background, the atmosphere, the whole situation. It’s like some reverse slam poetry talking about how good life is and how the simple pleasures should be enjoyed. I’m in love with this tik tok.
old alt rock fans in the notes are like:
1) this slaps and actually sounds like a lot of the classics
2) if i went to a concert and they played this i wouldnt even question it. id be like FUCK yeah they were watermelon!!!
Wow, how shocking the far right guy from an actual apartheid state who supports the far right German party and believes Jews foment hatred against whites did a Nazi salute at the inauguration. So shocking. I’m absolutely floored.
amhrancas 