Stressing that the memory seemed so fresh and vivid in their minds, the confused nation announced Monday that they could have sworn British entertainer Russell Brand was already a convicted sex offender. “Interesting…so Russell Brand definitely wasn’t already found guilty of sexual assault back in, like…2016, 2017?” said 39-year-old New York resident Scott Hasard, echoing the thoughts of 330 million Americans as he noted that when he saw allegations emerge about the actor, comedian, and podcast host, he had assumed it was simply repackaged content from nearly a decade ago.