My Grandma’s Doilies Are Not a Joke
This all day long … Elena Kanagy-Loux’s article is right-on. I myself have made it a point in recent years not to share any content that glibly uses the phrase, “not your grandma’s ” because it’s a) lazy and b) dismisses the real fact that grandmothers and older textile artists have worked hard to keep craft traditions alive and evolving, not to mention their immense skills. We should be thanking them and looking to them for inspiration, not mocking them. via @hyperallergic ❤️
When I started crocheting regularly as an adult, it was in 2004 when “Not Your Grandma’s” was supposed to be the height of coolness, and it pissed me off so much and still does because I learned from my grandma. Every stitch I make is my grandma’s. Why is it so fucking important to disconnect my grandmother from my art? And why are we trying so fucking hard to instill the idea that our grandmother’s way of stitching was less cool or interesting or engaging as how we do it?
Sean’s grandma passed this year, and I am now the very proud owner of some really lovely embroidery and crochet pieces for the house. They’re not uncool or silly or stupid. They’re useful items that were made beautiful by the patience, care, skill, and talent of a woman. Who was younger than I am now when she made at least some of them (there’s a whole set of table runners that just scream hope chest).
And these items are USEFUL to boot. That blanket? Keeps you warm. Those doilies? Keep grime from building up under the lamp and sticking to the table.
I’m not immune to the “Huh, silly thing people used to do” take, for the record. I’ve only recently realized that maybe our grandmothers’ (and parents’ in my case bathrooms) have fuzzy toilet covers and fuzzy floor mats because it catches all the goddamn toilet paper fuzz in the air, and it’s faster to vacuum the fuzzy toilet lid cover and rugs than it is to dust all that goddamn paper fluff off surfaces and then sweep it up and hope half of it didn’t end up back on the shelf.
But also, all of the crafts mentioned in the article were about making a home more beautiful. The home was the woman’s sphere, and it was her job amongst many to make it an attractive and nice place to be. And in treating fiber arts like you must get away from your grandmother’s influence, you are treating the home she built for herself and her family as dismissible and not worth respect.
In the end, it comes down to the dismissal of skilled labor because it was a woman doing it at home. Even if that work kept the family fed (lacework has saved a lot of lives in particular). Even if it kept the family warm (slippers, blankets, jackets, sweaters, mittens, scarves, hats), even if it kept the family house neater (how much dust did those doilies soak up so it was easier and faster to clean the whole house?), even if it kept the family looking respectable (my grandmother once darned my mother’s canvas band shoe than buy her a new pair; favorite story). Even if it kept the family safe (potholders and hot pads).
Because this skill was used to help a family and done up in popular styles of the time, it’s devalued and ignored. When, in fact, all it takes for any of those items to be of the moment again is usually just a color update.
amhrancas 